Evening Counseling Part III
Posted on Mon Jan 15th, 2024 @ 7:17pm by Lieutenant Vura & Ensign Millicent Ambrose
Edited on on Wed Jan 17th, 2024 @ 12:07am
0 words; about a 1 minute read
Mission:
Episode 15 - The Evil That Lies Beneath
Location: After 11 - Deck 11 - USS Pioneer
Timeline: MD002 1830 hrs
Vura nodded over at Milly, indicating that she should. Vura personally did not need a milkshake but the fact that Milly was exerting herself slightly (and with a man, no less), was encouraging and the longer she did it, the more that she would be able to heal. Of course, the Counselor was not going to bring up that point right now.
"Yes and one for my friend as well." that even slipped out from Milly as well. "And thank you."
Milly then went back into the safe cocoon. "I am excited to have a milkshake." she said with a smile. Milly was actually smiling.
When Milly slipped back in, the Counselor merely smiled knowingly at Milly and said, "So, you were going to tell me all about your interactions with Mr. Turner...."
"Ah yes, well, Connor," Milly skewed her face slightly up as she called to her mind her encounter with Connor. "I was taking some readings and also well, sneakily observing the others. He came into engineering. He looked familiar, and I got scared. He well...noticed I was staring at him. We kinda started a rather awkward conversation, after he asked me if he knew me then I tried to go hide, somewhere. He followed me, and I didn't want to just run out of engineering as I thought it would make him look bad. So, I mustered some courage and politeness to try to smooth things over. I really think he may think I am a nutter. " She gave a slight sigh or worry.
"I was so worried and scared, though and I just babbled but he did get some tea for us. It was Earl Grey. We talked in the break room, we weren't alone though, and that made me feel slightly better. Vura, he seems like a nice guy, doesn't have any hidden agenda, he is just a man who wanted to get back to the place he wanted to be in and that was engineering. I sort of offered him some encouraging words then I almost ran out of the breakroom. I managed to not to do so. I would like to be friends with him as I had mentioned earlier. But would he want to be friends with me?" Milly worried her lower lip as she thought it over.
"Well, it sounds like you had a fair amount of conversation. What made you want to be friends with him and why do you think that he would not want to be friends with you?"
"Connor doesn't put on airs, he is um... himself no matter who he is around? And so what if he talks to the computers. I heard people talk badly about him just 'cause he did such." Milly frowned at that. "Not nice when others speak badly and make fun of another. I don't think they liked the tonguelashing I gave them. Morons...." Milly fumed. "As for me wondering if Connor would like to be friends with me. I am maybe just too weird and eccentric, for him to even want to associate with me outside of work."
Vura was astonished at Milly. She was thinking that she was too weird and eccentric, yet, Connor talked to computers. "Milly, when was this that you defended Connor? And did he ever know about it?"
"Well, there was a group I was with, sorta like a club. The girls and guys were talking about what he was like. And well that is when I got pissed off. I no longer associated with them after that, and no, Connor doesn't know this. Look, I think it would be so lame and stupid that I go up to Connor and say hey, did you know I defended you 'cause some girls and guys were making fun of you? I am not some glory hound. And I can't believe I told you this either, I wasn't going to mention that to anyone," she huffed slightly.
"Why not?" Vura wondered curiously as she idly picked up her root beer. Without a word, the waiter slipped in and placed milkshakes before Milly and Vura. The counselor was astonished at how silent and efficient he was in this task.
Milly picked up a fry and dipped it into her milk shake enjoying the different flavors of both. "Well, to me it is bragging or could even be considered bragging. I don't roll that way. It just seems so wrong." gesturing with the next fry that she picked up to dip into the milkshake.
"So, you are saying that it is bragging to tell someone what you did, even though it is long in the past?" Vura asked wonderingly. "How is that? What you did was brave and honorable. It takes a lot of guts to stand up to your friends, even if they did not stay friends." She took a sip of the root beer and her eyes closed as Vura felt the carbonation tickle her tastebuds and the combination of sugar and vanilla slide across simultaneously.
"It feels like that to me. I know...and I did say I was weird. I didn't think it was brave thing what I did. It was just something I felt strongly about and so I did it, that is all, nothing more than that." She stuffed the French fry into her mouth feeling a little bit glum for some reason. I didn't want to do any bragging. And now I feel like I just did. ooh look at me look at me aren't I just so cool?
"I assure you," Vura started, opening her eyes again. "What you did was incredibly brave. At the age that most people are in the Academy, they can easily be influenced by their peers and you were not."
She picked up a fry and placed it into her mouth. Half of it still hung from her mouth as she slowly bit into it and held it there. There was a swallow shortly after and she managed to use her teeth to capture the rest of the fry. Vura chewed it more quickly and swallowed. "Enjoyable," she said to nobody in particular.
The Counselor then looked back at Milly, "I am interested, however, why you did it, besides you feeling strongly about it. From what you have told me, you did not really have much interaction with Connor back at the Academy. Did you want to befriend him then? Perhaps something more?"
Milly had just popped a french fry in her mouth and was in midbite when Vura asked her questions. Milly opened her mouth to correct Vura's thinking when she breathed in and the fry went down the wrong way. She started coughing, almost choking on her fry. She managed to dislodge the little bit and grabbed the root beer to help wash it down. When the bout of coughing subsided, Milly croaked out.
"Vura, it was just the right thing to do. There wasn't any other thought except for just that, no ulterior motive." Some tears were shimmering in her eyes. Maybe it was due to almost choking or just a memory of what happened. The people had asked her the very same question as Vura had just now.
"Hmmmm," Vura mused thoughtfully. "So, what did you do after that? Did you ever talk to Connor after that, before today?" She took another couple quick bites of her burger and watched Milly as she responded.
Milly thought back to the academy days to the few classes she had with Connor. "After I dropped those jerks, I was swept into another group of friends who were actually lovely and were sincerely nice. Connor, a couple of times I did try, but wasn't successful in having any sort of conversation with him. Then again he had Holly, and he had eyes only for her."
Vura snickered lightly. Did Milly even hear herself speak. Eyes only for her, indeed. "I'm curious, Milly. Do you just follow other people's whims? You got caught up in one group and then swept into the next. When do you choose to do things?"
"Vura, I traveled from one different group, to another, being part of them and yet not. And I did create a group with a friend of mine. I marched to my own tune, was so charming, so... outgoing...well according to a few people. I even challenged a girl for the 'favor' of a boy, she was treating him like he was her personal slave and that just... irked me something fierce. She was calling him to her like he was a dog. Can you believe that?" Milly scoffed. "Well, there was a challenge given by me, and I called to him, she called to him and he came to me as I never treated him like that. Once he came over to me, I said to him, you are free from her. He never associated with her anymore. He found himself a better girlfriend. It wasn't me though. He and I were just friends."
Milly's eyes were filled with fire at recalling that and picked up her milkshake which was melting slightly and drank some of it.
"So fierce. So brave. Such an honorable person.... And yet, you're worried that you will mess things up for Connor?" Vura bent down, keeping her eyes on Milly, smiling knowingly all the while. She took a small sip of the milkshake and wondered what Milly would do with this information, or whether she could even process it.
"I feel I don't quite know how to be a friend, did I ever really know how to be one? Gosh I sound so lame, and I am lame." Milly said quietly. She looked at the half-eaten burger, feeling like she had lost her appetite. "And here I am moaning about my hard lot in life, when there are those who have a tougher life than what I ever had."
"I beg to differ on both counts," the counselor replied coming to Milly's defense. "You've been a friend to Connor without him knowing it. You defended him when he needed it. Whether he knew it or not is not relevant. As to having tougher life, I cannot personally think of many people that had it worse that being psychologically tortured and kidnapped by someone she loved. There is no greater betrayal of trust, nor more harsh set of circumstances without being maimed or murdered. You have been through all sorts of trauma and you're starting to come out on the other side."
The counselor leaned in closely towards Milly. "Our job, now, Milly, is to get you back to the person that you were. The way you describe yourself, you had quite a few virtues and were not afraid to speak your mind. I bet you were a heck of a lot of fun, too." Vura lightly tapped the table. "So, remember who you were. What would that person do with regard to Connor?"
"That other me seems like an almost forgotten character in a book, but she would try to talk to him even though he was shy. She had a knack for getting a shy person to talk to her or so someone had said. Just that a person needs to approach someone shy, in a gentle way and not mind their possible awkwardness. I am not her anymore. I feel shy, awkward, uncomfortable with myself. I know I have a problem which is why I am talking to you, I just... am feeling lost and scared, maybe even a little bit paranoid." Milly picked up a spoon and idly started stirring her milkshake, watching the content slowly spin.
"You are still that person, Milly," Vura told Milly definitively. "And the fact that right now you feel like someone like Connor apparently is should make it easier for you to approach him and talk to him. If not easier to approach him, then likely easier for the both of you to talk. You're both coming from a place where you're tentative and uncertain, in your words. Perhaps you could even build each other up?" The counselor took another fry, leaned back, and let her words hang in the air.
Milly contemplated Vura's words, maybe there was some hope for herself? It did take a team to repair a ship that had taken a lot of damage. "Maybe I can do that, maybe I can look at um.. me I guess, as if I were a severely injured ship? I know that sounds weird but that is kinda the only way I can even think on rebuilding myself or even building up Connor; well, the two of us as friends. Still computers, a ship, machinery are easier to figure out than people, and I am included in the people part."
"I have a feeling that Connor thinks very similarly," Vura replied simply. "At the end of the day, Milly, I can be here for you all you want; but the heavy lifting, you have to be willing to do it. If you are unwilling to work on yourself or attempt to reach out to others, well, I'm afraid there's not much anyone can do for you."
Vura took another sip of her root beer and then sighed. "I really hope that you're willing to put in the work, Milly. I would like nothing more than to see you become who you were meant to be."
"I don't like being like this, it's not enjoyable. It's going to take some time though, from what I've been told by the other counselor. Just...I am glad I have someone I can talk to, and I can't shut people out...." She drew in a breath, then decided to finish off her burger even though it was cold now. Her appetite seemed to be coming back after talking with Vura.
The counselor nodded understandingly. "No, you can't shut people out. Besides, I'm sure that you would rather reach out to others on your terms than all the many ways that I would do it for you." Vura smiled devilishly at Milly before taking another bite of her burger.
After thoroughly chewing and swallowing, Vura asked Milly, "So, what is your plan? You're an engineer, I'm sure that you have one." The counselor giggled lightly.
"Uh I didn't have a plan yet. My first step was to see you," Milly replied thinking things over, then her eyes flashed wide, and she stared at Vura. It just hit her, "Hey! I talked to that waiter and saw his eyes. What the heck? Vura you are one smooth person, you know that?" Milly giggled, a natural smile appearing. "I don't think I can do that again just yet... but...." She drank down the rest of her milkshake.
"You can," Vura replied with another light giggle. "You saw it yourself. You can do it if you don't get too much into your head."
She then held up her hands cautioning Milly not to say anything for a moment. "Now, look, don't understand me to say not to think. The problem is that if you think out every possible situation then you are never going to act. If you don't act, you're always going to be like this. I don't think you like this or want this. So, get out of your head. Get into the moment. If you have a concern, contact me, and we can talk about it. Fair?"
Milly nodded, "That is fair. Thanks, I feel that the closed door is starting to creak open, with the hinges squealing loudly in protest." She stated, "It's a good start I hope." She sucked in some air then let it out slowly. "I should get going. Tomorrow is a new day and I've got a shift that I am looking forward to."
Vura shook her head and said, "Not so fast. We have to discuss when and where we're meeting next. I propose next week at this very table and place. Also, you still have not told me how you're going to handle Mr. Turner."
Milly eased herself back down at the table. "Well, where Connor is concerned, I uh...will have to try to go with my instincts, well the ones that don't tell me to run away. It's going to have to be cautiously, but I am going to have to be in the moment?" Milly uttered thoughtfully.
Satisfied, Vura nodded. "I think that will be a good start." She took another fry and placed it into her mouth before washing it down with her milkshake. "So, if not before, next week, same time, same table?"
Milly gave a nod of agreement. "Sounds good to me. I like the sound of that and thank you Vura. I do appreciate this, a lot." She cast her eyes towards the curtain, seeming to call upon some inner strength and then rose from the table. "Night Vura," Milly uttered then stepped through the curtain, to leave After 11. She gave a quiet nod to their waiter, mouthing out a thank you to him. Then she was gone.
"Good night, Milly," Vura called as the young ensign exited. The Counselor continued to sit and eat, musing about Connor Turner and wondering how she could have gotten so many things wrong about him. Maybe she needed to check in with Zhara.
A Joint Post By
Ensign Millicent Ambrose
Engineer, USS Pioneer
Lieutenant Vura
Chief Counselor, USS Pioneer
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